My plan today is not to hide from difficult feelings. Let's see how THAT one goes!

If I'm struggling - fearful, anxious, guilty, resentful - I manage considerable better if I "own" the feeling. And if I'm afraid, that fear is somehow diminished if I admit to it rather than try and hide it.

Experiencing - sitting inside - my own fear can sometimes make me so fraught and  anxious that I try to pretend it's not actually there. This is when I get into trouble, though -  for example, it used to be when I'd look for crutches such as alcohol to hold me up.

Nowadays I use less risky crutches, such as a good grumble to a pal or a piece of stonkingly good chocolate, a great film and a roaring fire; really, I manage just by treating myself the way I'd treat a best friend if she was feeling that way. And why wouldn't I? I should BE my own best buddy - no-one knows me better than I do, and no-one's more invested in my own wellbeing than I am!

Owning my own fear can, in a roundabout way, actually give me strength. It allows me not to be caught off guard or get overly triggered by whatever frightens me. When I know I am afraid, and acknowledge it - look it squarely in the face - I have a stronger psychological position than when I deny that part of myself.

It's okay for me to be afraid. In fact it's just normal. In any event, it'd be nuts to deny it: it may not be optimal, but it is all I've got. It's what is, and it's the only 'is' there is!

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